You know how people get this irrational hatred for certain celebrities? I kind of get that with phrases. Only mine is rational. Totally rational. Because they’re being overused*.
So, here are my offending articles of wordisms, in approximate order of offensiveness:
- Pop of colour.
- On point. On fleek.
- [Something] is my spirit animal
- To be obsessed with [something]
Please stop. Please just stop. It’s like Phrase Bingo For LadyBlogging101. Basic Pinterest For The Masses.
NO MORE POPS OF COLOUR FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THAT IS KALEIDOSCOPIC.
Last year, in a fit of creative & maybe-a-tad-over-the-top rage, I came up with some alternatives for “pop of colour”, which I would fondly like to offer below. Please feel free to mock me. Or even use one of these alternatives:
Splash of colour
Dash of colour
Sprinkling of colour
Glimmering of colour
Seedy undercurrent of colour
Zing of colour
Zip of colour
Tiddlybit of colour
Burst of colour
Garnish of colour
Tang of colour
Wash of colour
Peppering of colour
Salting of colour
Savagery of colour
Fizz of colour
Flibbertigibbet of colour
Then I started thinking about “on point/on fleek” (par example: “daymn your blush-coloured cold-shoulder top and matte-greige stiletto nails are on point, girl!”) which is not quite as grating but still gets stuck in my ears like bits of word-shaped gravel. How about (using, naturally, your hat as the exciting style choice in question):
Your hat… looks nice
Your hat… is awesome
Your hat… is admirably trendy, my friend
Your hat… is so hot right now (best spoken out loud in Zoolander accent)
Your hat… is super impressive
Your hat… is hotdizzle, yo
Your hat… makes me feel all the feelings
I like your hat
Feel free to pin for future reference. Or mock me. Whichever comes more naturally.
As for “genius” – I would like to suggest “clever”. Or even “actually rather unremarkable”. Unless of course you are talking about very clever people, and NOT ways in which to clean your kitchen sink using baking soda, or organising cans of condensed soup in your pantry, or gluing rocks together to make stylish unique table centerpieces. In which case, I beg your pardon.
Soo… I’m going to end this here before my ranting segues into the True Uselessness Of Baking Soda, or Why Household Organisation Is An Unachievable Unicorn Goal. Clearly I need to step away from The Pinterest if only for the good of my blood pressure.
Till next time, dear reader! Enjoy your tiddlywinks of colour.
* Disclaimer: this might be because I spend way too much time on Pinterest & blogs, which appears to the native habitats for the so-called offending phrases.